Today’s blog
Lynn Murphy Mark
Reflections
Back home, at my desk with its familiar view, with Mollie dog close by, I have left New Mexico behind. With that said I know that there is a place in my mind where I can always visit and remember the wide views of pinon studded landscape, ringed by those mountains. There are different groups of mountains: the Ortiz, the Sangre de Cristo, the Jemez, and from certain points, the Sandias behind Albuquerque. The Sangre de Cristo mountains are my “favorites”. They loom over Santa Fe like guardians of the city of Holy Faith. When seasons change, those are the ones I watch as colors manifest in beautiful and predictable ways. Deep green for Summer, aspen yellow in the Fall, snow topped in Winter, and young green in Spring – those are the vistas from just about any place in Santa Fe.
When Sheila and I were at the monastery we probably spend 10 hours working on our reading and writing. I had brought a book, “Drop the Rock”. It is about the Sixth and Seventh Steps of the Twelve Steps, the specific steps that enter into an agreement with God to give over my character defects, my shortcomings. Working these steps requires that I identify those troublesome aspects that keep me from living my best life. Having done that, the challenge is to turn them loose into God’s keeping, and work on how to live without them. Many of them are coping strategies developed as early as childhood. Somehow they were woven into the set of behaviors that may have started as soothing agents. Over time, though, most of them existed to cover over my fears, anxieties, and anger.
We had gone to the monastery with heavy hearts because Sheila’s sister in Mississippi was struggling with a number of very uncomfortable symptoms. We gave her brother the emergency number that goes to the Guestmaster’s office – the one life line with the outside world. We hoped that he would not have to use it, meaning that her sister was resting more comfortably.
That was not to be. We hurried home so Sheila could be in close contact with her family, and so she could book a flight to Jackson.
As I left my beloved landscapes I gave a prayer of gratitude for the chance to be a part of the tribe of women who live in Santa Fe. I know that I am always welcome to be in their company. My six years living in Santa Fe are a colorful and happy weave in my tapestry. I am blessed by that interval.
Yesterday was day two of my trip home. It started with lightning and thunder and an absolute cascade of heavy rain. I left Oklahoma City soaked to the bone just from going to my car. Fortunately, finding Highway 44 was not too tricky, although I was talking on the phone with Katie and missed the entrance. The GPS lady, Sister Bridget, began her litany of “make a legal U turn”, etc. etc. etc. Anyway, I got back on 44 without incident. By this time the rain was relentless. I spent two white knuckled hours driving through the worst rainstorm I have ever experienced. Visibility was less than 10 feet and most drivers had their blinking lights on. There were a few minutes when visibility was limited to the hood of my car and I crept along hoping that I would have enough time to stop if necessary. When the rain let up some I found a McDonald’s to get some coffee. An Amazon driver held the door for me and we commiserated about what we had just experienced. Even the toll booth ladies commented on the dangerous conditions. One lady said a prayer for safe travels. Now that was sweet and worth the $5 toll.
When I reached Missouri I had left the storm behind. I also left behind a treasure trove of people and enjoyable hours. As I neared St. Louis I rearranged my thoughts, thinking of the blessings that I was approaching. I spoke to a few people on the phone, anxious to hear how their world was doing. So here I am this morning, settling back into life as usual.