Today’s blog
Lynn Murphy Mark
Saudade.
What an odd word to come across on this Christmas Day – my Word Daily email produced this elegant Portuguese word. It is one of the few words that remains with me from a six year life in Brazil. At age 16, I graduated from high school and left Sao Paulo for college. We were required to take Portuguese in high school and at one point I was proficient in this language that is similar to Spanish, but not interchangeable. Portuguese is a more guttural language than Spanish and did not flow as easily off my tongue, but I could conversate in Portuguese pretty easily until I left it behind.
Anyway, “Saudade” is a word that means a sense of longing for things past. It is a little melancholic and nostalgic in nature and it perfectly describes my feeling when Christmas Day is almost over. I have enjoyed having Jackie and the boys here for Christmas. But it’s almost time to put Christmas 2023 into the books and prepare to greet 2024. Jackie and the boys will soon go back to New Jersey and I will think about how quickly the time passed.
All the anticipation leading up to these few days is over, and I am already feeling a bit of sadness that we live at such a distance from each other.
Seeing Christmas through children’s eyes is one big jolt of joy. Last night we went down to Union Station and boarded the Polar Express ride. They boys had never been on a train before, but they have traveled extensively by air, so the train was probably fairly tame for them. However, this train ride featured a very convincing Santa Claus who kindly stopped and had his picture taken with a lot of the kids in our train car. There was hot chocolate and singing elves and cookies and even a mug for each passenger to commemorate the ride.
Then I waited for them to fall asleep. My job was to hang the stockings on the mantle with care so they would see them first thing in the morning. This morning I was up at my usual 5 AM time. I quietly made myself a mug of coffee and fired up the computer. The house was very quiet until six AM when I heard a squeaky boy’s voice proclaim to his brother, “Xander!! Wake up!! Santa was here!!” They were astounded that Santa had found them when they aren’t even in their own home. They saw the stockings embroidered with their names and plucked them off the mantle. There were three little gifts each in the stockings, since their big gift was the Polar Express ride, and there are probably more gifts at the other grandparent’s home.
My other source of saudade is that Christmas music will fade away for another 11 months. I don’t know why I’m such a fool about the songs of the season. I love the notes, the instruments, the words, the messages, the singers, the orchestras, all of it. I probably have 50 hours of this music on the computer, carefully curated over the years. Even the group, Chicago, has produced a fun album. It lives intertwined with Dame Julie Andrews, Linda Ronstadt, James Taylor, Mannheim Steamroller, and San Francisco’s Gay Men’s choir, Chanticleer. Their music is a cappella, and beautiful.
It’s very quiet here now. The boys and Jackie are off to visit her siblings, their Aunt and Uncle, also in from out of town. In a few days everyone will be back in their regular places and regular life will resume. We will ring in a new year and wonder what it will bring. I will think back on my time with my grandsons and be grateful for them, and also a little nostalgic for the Christmas experiences we shared.