Today’s blog
Lynn Murphy Mark
Generations
I’m home now, after 5 days in my New Jersey family’s home. It’s always good to get home, but remnants of the trip cling to me. Right now Tracy Chapman just sang the words, “a place for me in your heart”. I have a huge place in my heart for my first born and her boys and their dad. Since I’m an early riser I witnessed the boys getting up, getting dressed, maybe eating a little breakfast. Jackie leaves early in the morning, so Momoh is in charge of getting boys ready for school. As I watched the furious preparations I was taken back to when it was my job to get my kids ready for their days. After coats were on, backpacks were gathered, out the door they went. The silence left behind was deafening. I drank coffee and reflected on how much energy it takes to be a parent.
Tuesday was Xander’s fifth birthday. He has been excited about this magic number for weeks. At his school they have been keeping a calendar to cross off the days until his birthday. As the big day wore on he kept declaring this the best birthday ever. At school he expressed his excitement by saying, “I have been waiting all my life to be 5!” I’m still laughing at that one. As for myself, this year I will have been waiting all my life to be 75! Somehow that doesn’t sound as charming.
Jackie juggles a full time high pressure job, two very energetic boys, and a huge project in upstate New York where they are doing much of the building of an A-frame cabin. They are there most weekends, which cuts into the usual time to prepare for the week to come. I don’t know how she does it with great love, patience, and humor. I can’t help but worry about how much wear and tear of stress she is handling. I suppose that’s part of my job as her mother.
Meanwhile, on the other coast, Ted and Sarah are learning to live with their sorrow at the loss of their beloved Seymour. They are deeply wounded by the absence of his beautiful and elegant self. In early December I had a vision for a gift for them. I know a young woman with an incredible talent as an artist. She is able to study a photograph of an animal, then create an astounding likeness with pencil and charcoal. Many years ago at my church in Santa Fe I mentored her for a year when she was 12. She is now in her 20’s, finished with college, and living in Albuquerque. Anyway, I got the idea to have her do a drawing of Seymour. Perhaps I had a presentiment that Seymour’s memory needed to be preserved. Ted and Sarah chose some pictures of Seymour and I sent them off to Nina to do her magic.
The portraits are now ready. I asked Ted if I could send him pictures of them, knowing that seeing them would be, as he said, bittersweet. When I get the originals, I will send them off to Los Angeles. I hope they also give a measure of comfort to my West Coast kids.
Yesterday after I got home I slept for several hours in the afternoon. By 8:30 pm I was ready to get to bed as quickly as I could. I suppose the fatigue came from absorbing the energy from a whirlwind visit. I hope I can stay awake today, since I have a mountain of work waiting for me downtown. I can tuck this last visit into my memory book with its new chapters unfolding.