Today’s blog

Lynn Murphy Mark

Cracking up

As far as I’m concerned, life would not be worth living if we were a humorless species. I have met a few people who seem to lack the ability to be amused. I know right away that they need special handling and that I need to keep my funny side to myself. One of my aunts was such a person. Her aura was of the serious and no-nonsense type. There’s nothing wrong with that but I always wondered if her life felt as heavy to her as it looked to me. 

My sense of the absurd came straight from my mother, and from the Irish side of my family. As for my mom, she was raised by a humorless woman. My grandmother always bustled around looking very serious and purposeful. I believe my grandfather, whom I never knew, had to be the repository of gaiety in the family for my mom to have turned out so witty. I am eternally grateful to have gotten the mirth gene. 

Yesterday I was talking to Rose, who is in Florida enjoying Spring Training. Besides catching a couple of games and getting a lot of rest, they went to a turtle sanctuary as their out trip for the day. Rose was describing the different aspects of being a turtle. She asked me, “Did you know  there are turtle ophtalmologists?”. My answer? “Of course I know that. It’s where Mitch McConnell gets his glasses!” . That’s the thing about being kind of funny; I’m not ever sure what will come out of my mouth. If you are a Mitch McConnell fan – I was going to apologize, but come on, he looks like a startled turtle most of the time. As far as I’m concerned, it’s his most endearing quality.

At work I try to keep the atmosphere light. We do so much heavy lifting as we navigate the laws of immigration that we deserve a break as often as we can get one. I am blessed to have three colleagues who have a well-developed sense of the jollies. As a member of the nursing profession, where life and death matters are a big part of the work day, I know the importance of being able to release tension by enjoying a good laugh. I’m not saying that nursing humor is always appropriate. I am saying that it’s a necessity. 

People have asked me how I could do the work of a hospice nurse. My answer is to say that I laughed more in my hospice days than in any other specialty. Well, except being a middle school nurse. Anyway, laughter was sometimes a part of that most serious of visits – when a death has occurred. More often than not, family members present would tell funny stories about their loved one. The laughter that ensued was a healing balm, if only for a short while. 

I heard about the woman who was such a terrible driver that one day she got her car wedged in sideways in the garage and they had to take down the outside wall in order to move her car. As her husband told that story, he and the kids were cracking up. Once I spent several hours with three daughters who decided to break into the stash of wine that their mother had been saving for a special occasion. It took quite a while for the funeral home to get to the house, so there were a couple of hours of serious wine drinking and hysterical stories about their mom. 

When Sheila and I decided to write our book, “Kaleidoscope Diaries, Stories of Wit and Resilience”, it started as a funny true stories project. Being a retired educator and a retired nurse, between us we had a lifetime of humorous anecdotes. As it happens, we realized that we needed to write about some serious aspects of our lives as we told our stories. But there are some hilarious tales that readers tell us made them laugh out loud.

When my kids are hosting my wake, I hope they hear, over and over again, “Wherever  your mom was, there was laughter.” And so it is.

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